Dear [neighbor], We love your dog.  We really do.  He’s a sweet and gentle animal that always wags his tail when he sees us.   I think it’s great that you give him so much space in your fenced yard for him to run around and be “free.”   But would it hurt your to bring him in at night?   He barks constantly.  I’m convinced he doesn’t sleep, in part because I don’t get much sleep.   And that’s only my selfish reason for this letter.  Have you considered your pet’s well-being?  As he doesn’t bark much during the day, I can only assume he is asking to go inside.  It’s winter, and he is probably cold on the frozen grass.  Yes, we are in a southern state, but not so much that you can claim the nights are warm.   It confuses me, as you are by all other accounts a good pet owner.   I see you coming home with new toys for him, playing with him in the yard, and even taking him on walks daily.  When I hint ...

Dear [Bossman] I understand that you have trouble conceptualizing any event which is more than 2 weeks into the future, but given that during todays staff meeting we had traipsed into discussing March events I thought it pertinent to bring up my approved time off spanning the last week of February into March. Many of our staffers like to work a couple weeks to months into future planning, as they are smart, organized and capable people, and so I wished to give them ample time to discuss with me any impending projects or needs from myself. Knowing too that due to the President's Day holiday, we will only have one more staff meeting before my said vacation, I thought it was all the more necessary to remind people of my impending time off, for theirs and my sake, as you well know how annoying it is to be bothered while on vacation by a simple problem that could have been taken care of earlier, simply given some professional forethought and preparation. But despite all this, you fe...

Dear [Co-worker], Talking to you about race was outside my comfort zone, even if I don't like admitting that. But I came to you because I was convicted it was an important part of my job and would make me a better person. I understood that communicating some of these difficult ideas was at least a part of your job as well and not that you had an obligation to represent everyone of your race. I am sad our workplace is not more diverse and I don't have more people here to speak to about these things professionally. All that said, I thought our conversations were productive. I listened to everything you said, all your experiences and insights. And you told me how much you appreciated that I cared enough to ask the questions and hear the answers. You told me it wasn't a problem to give me this time because you could tell I truly wanted to understand. And then, maybe naively I tried to bring those insights into my work. You seemed un-surprised when this backfired. I know tha...

Woman!  Holy shit! Are you your son's personal secretary AND consultant?  Why would you do his whole resume for him?  Are you determined to have him dependent on you his whole life?  That's really the only reason I can think of for that email.  I'm so tired of this shit.   If it were up to me, I'd never visit.  I would encourage [fiance] to do the same. He loves you, but he knows what you do is wrong.  Ever since [fiance] moved closer to me, I have never felt welcomed into your creepy family.  Your children are grown.  One of them has realized that, and you can't handle it, can you?  Your daughter is a financial leech and an overgrown 5 year old with a princess complex.  I'm not entirely sure that it's her fault.  If you loved her (and not your need for a dependent) you'd move away and stop encouraging her emotional blackmail.    

Can I just list the things I let slide? You voted for the Cheeto. You insulted my dog. You made horrible comments about my friends. You have B.O.  Always. Can I list the things that have ended our friendship? I needed you after I was assaulted, and you just made jokes and ignored my calls.

[Sister], Okay, I get it, you don’t like me.  Whatever.  I gave up caring about that a long time ago.  But why do you think it’s okay to punish my son?  [Son] is smart; he sees what’s going on.  He knows that at family gatherings, you have a gift ready for [niece] but not him.   He knows you avoid him.  Do you see his face?!  I wish you did.  It breaks my heart every time.   So screw you!  It takes a real bitch to hurt a six year old.  I wish I could punch you in the face and kick you in the vagina (and I'm not a violent person). I’m done, [Sender]